Are We Really a Friendly and Kind Lot?
You know that the traffic conditions in Putrajaya after the fireworks show on Saturday was horrendous right? So there I was, stuck for more than 40 minutes trying to get out of Putrajaya alone. As I had two cameras with me, I wound down my window and started to take pictures of the scenic surroundings. No one else was with me in the car (nobody was enthusiastic enough to tag along, unfortunately!).
Suddenly, a pair of foreign couple who were walking along the sidewalk (carrying small backpacks) yelled “Excuse me!”, and started to walk towards my car. The traffic was really bad and all the cars came to a halt. The man then asked me if I was going to Kuala Lumpur. Well, I was indeed following the road signs that say ‘Kuala Lumpur’, in order to get out of that confusing administrative capital. So I blurted “Yeah?” without much thought, even though I wasn’t actually going to KL.
He then asked if he and his girlfriend could hitch a ride from me, as they couldn’t get a cab. He added that he would pay me RM50 per kilometer or something, just as long as I could take them to some place where they could catch a cab. At that moment, I tried to put myself in their shoes and indeed, I understood perfectly that it was difficult to get a cab at that time, in that traffic conditions. Heck, I don’t think there was even any cab at all!
So, I was ready to offer them a ride, but hadn’t invited them in. I was silent for a while, and tried to think where I could drop them. At that juncture, a torrent of other nasty thoughts also came to my mind. How could I be sure if they were telling the truth? Mind you, they did not look suspicious at all. In fact, they even looked friendly. I really wanted to help. It was definitely not about the money - I don’t think I’d even take a sen if I had really agreed to give them a ride. It was about security.
I think if I had at least another friend in the car at that time, I would have agreed. But no, I was all alone and if anything happened, I’d be in deep shit. I had too much to risk. In the end, I apologetically uttered “I’m sorry…”, and I suggested that they tried some other cars behind. I felt so bad, I honestly did. They left without saying a word, and I drove forward as the car in front had already moved.
I wound up my window, and proceeded to SMS a couple of friends what had happened. Most of them said they’d do the same thing, almost without a doubt. But if only they could see the disappointment in the couple’s eyes… I even worried about giving them a bad impression about this country! A friend, Toong, joked that I had ‘let our great nation down’ (exact words), but went on to say he’d probably have done the same.
I wish I could tell everyone that we Malaysians are really a kind and friendly lot… but now I don’t think I’m even qualified to say that. If you were me, in such a short span of 1 minute, would you have decided to give them a ride? Actually, I’m starting to regret that I refused to help…
Edit@1034hrs: Zewt asked about their nationality. If you’re wondering too, I’m sorry to say that I don’t know. They looked Hispanic, though.
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21 Aug 2007 narrowband
I would have done the same in your situation. But I do sympathize with the foreign couple.
Better be safe than sorries… becos we live in an unsafe country.. *shrug*
Apalah sorang2 pi… lain kali, ajaklah kiter… ;)
i think most of us would have done the same thing… so no biggie there. they should have asked another car with more than a person in it. did you tell them your reason for not taking them?
what nationality are they by the way?
Yeah I would have say no too.
Besides hitchhiking is not our norm. Insecurity.
Would you have hitchhike if you don’t have any transport? No also right?
My first response when the foreigner asked if he could take a lift from you was ‘It’s not safe for you!’
Actually in Singapore, I have offered my help to foreigners who looked lost. I guess in Singapore, it’s not so bad because it’s my country and I know where to look for help. I don’t go to deserted places. I’ve even housed foreigners who lost their money and passports to theft. Berani ah. hehe….
Most likely I will give them a ride, based on my first instinct, that is.
u did the right thing, dun feel bad. you’re by yourself & you dunno them..i would’ve done the same
i think I would have done the same thing. much that I would’ve like to help, one can never judge a book by its cover. not in today’s world.
i was in Air Itam, Penang. A guy asked me for a lift. I was new then. I agreed. He didnt want to get off at the agreed place. He didnt ask for money. Just didnt want to get off. I paid him RM50.00 to have food at a nearby coffeeshop. I was very silly. I thought situation in Penang same as in rural Sibu. :( i put myself in unnecessary risk.
I was a sucker.
erm, i think i would do the same thing too. dun feel bad as you are so willing to help but you cant do that in this country. you have to protect yourself else you are making yourself into troubles. perhaps they do not understand why malaysian not helping them in this situation but they definitely will not blame you if they understand the security in malaysia nowadays.
don’t feel bad. it is perfectly natural to do so. after all, you wouldn’t want to be robbed of your beloved car, now would you?
if i had my dad and only if it was my dad, only then i would let someone hitch a ride. but if not, no go.
it is not like we’re being mean, it is really a matter of whether or not we will get booted out of our own cars if these people had conspired with someone else to hit you hard. don’t worry about it. =)
I would feel exactly as you do because I would have done the same thing. I know how you feel…. we wanna help but yet we want to be safe. But there are too many scary stories going around, and giving rides to strangers are really a no-no in Boleh-land.
Maybe you should ask the another car for help rather than say sorry.
pity them also.
If i was on travel in oversea, i feel sad as well.
i think i would have given them a ride..provided i know the directions well. hehe
You’re a guy, imagine how a girl like me would feel… lagi scared!
Rinnah - Exactly. It’s sympathy I was feeling.
Angel - I’m also inclined to believe that it could be just as unsafe in other countries :(.
You so bzee, got time meh? ;(. Supposed to go tonight again, meet Julee there but then tetiba hujan at about 9:20pm! Decided not to :p
Zewt - No our conversation did not last more than 60 seconds. I did not tell them my reason, I never had the chance. Wish I did, though. I’m not sure about their nationality…
Che-cheh - But then normally gals would say no also ler. I’m not a gal mah :(. Eh ya, come to think of it, I probably wouldn’t hitch-hike like that myself too, same reason.
ECL - Well the thing about driving back from Putrajaya is that you have to use highways and all, so it’s not really ‘in town’, where there’re people everywhere. Well if you’re sure they’re telling the truth, why not? I’d help in any way I can, if I’m convinced that they’re telling the truth.
Jason - My first instinct was to help too. Heh. Then the ’second thoughts’ came in. That’s when I decided to ask them try some other cars behind (there were hundreds of other cars along that road, but they only came to me, as far as I could see!).
Wuching - I wish I could explain to them my reasons, which I didn’t.
Bkworm - I understand that women should, in normal cases, not offer strangers a lift. And yeah, I agree that we can’t judge a book by its cover these days.
Bengbeng - Wow what a pest, that guy! I don’t know what I’d have done, so I can’t say if your giving him RM50 was the right thing to do. Well at least you managed to get rid of him! And uhm, on the brighter side, you were not robbed (well, not directly at least) so I guess that’s a good thing.
Hui - Maybe other countries are like this too? Maybe it was just me being a paranoid, thinking too much? But I definitely had too much to risk - my car, my cameras, phone and other belongings. Most foreigners believe Malaysia is a safe, peaceful and friendly place, actually.
Jasmyin - Why only your dad? What if it were your friends? If I had at least one friend with me in the car, I’d have given them a ride. Well, it’s interesting to read the mixed reactions from my
readersfriends on this.Giddy Tiger - I only hope they managed to find someone to take them out of that place. I believe that there was a better chance if they’d approached a car with at least 2 people inside.
Changhh - You mean, I should open my door, and get out of my car, walk towards the car at the back, and help them to do the asking? Hmm. Kinda defeats the purpose of my refusing to help in the first place!
Yes, I deeply sympathized with them. It was such a dilemma. I did put myself in their shoes, and I’d be very sad and disappointed (maybe angry, too!) if it happened to me.
EJ - Well, directions was not a problem because by hook or by crook, I had to get out of there anyway. In any case, there were hundreds of other cars along that road, almost all stationary and they only came to me - as far as I could see, that is.
Sunflower - Yes I understand that perfectly well; that’s why I don’t expect girls to offer strangers a ride, at least not Malaysian girls. I still think it’d been more appropriate if they tried cars which had more people inside.
If I would’ve gone with you when u offered to pick me up, it might be a more rational & safer judgment to give them a lift. Otherwise, I would personally think it’s not very safe to do so too. I guess they’d haf to do with understanding the situation at a certain place at & at a certain time frame. I’m sure given a safer situation, we would all gladly give em a ride anytime.
well, if it happens to me, i really cant say..i’ve really offered to pick up several kids and teenage from the resort outside my house to the main road….maybe if it happens in kl, i would do the exact same thing as u.
:P
No i mean, if you cannot drive them, maybe you can help them ask the car behind you to help the foreigners, or call police for help, rather than just say Sorry.
Or if you brave enough, explain to them that you feel unsafe you are alone. But you still can say i can help you by calling another cars or police for help. I am sure they will understand your situation as well.
Hie there, I’m from MMU too, just bumped into ur blog recently..Hmmm i would give them a ride since Putrajaya is a well guarded area, but if someone wana hitch a ride around KL / PJ area, you better say NO
goodness, at one point i thought u let them in :D
i would have done the same thing in fact ;)
Ei… last nite, while I was cooking (idle mind, I suppose), I suddenly thot abt this and hor… I hv a feeling they are trying to rob u!!!! Why I say liddat? Becos hor… becos… becos… becos my gut feeling told me??? Becos… who’d (be stupid enuff) to offer RM50/km??? U think and see… ngam mou???
After I had this thot, I shivered thinking, “What if you had….” I dun dare think… :|
ps: Actuarry wanted to ajak u go see fireworks tonite wan but then I saw the ’schedule’, malam nie tarak pulak… aiyah…
I have given lifts to a few unknown people . I guess I am stupid but so far nothing bad happened.
If I am alone, I doubt I will do it too because nowadays its simply too risky to give lift to unknown strangers moreover if you’re alone. Certain decision are hard to make, but I believe they will also understand your situation. Chill.
yea david…you were alone…we’d all have done the same…don’t put yourself in risky situations if you don’t have to…we don’t want to lose you yet hor…=P
I went there on wednesday for Australia fireworks presentation.. We stuck for almost an hour in order to reach the Bridge.
Or they could have hailed down some police car, if there were any?
I feel you, man! Sometimes as much as I would like to help those strangers out, I have my own safety to be concerned of. But I seriously hope they understand.
Nice fireworks pictures by the way. ^^
Actually I don’t think they would understand, in their desperation… But maybe next time you can just ask more questions first to see their nature. But you never know eh?
Me and Chew were met up with this Sarawakian guy in Petaling Street once. He came to us, sweaty and desperate, asking for RM50 to help him get to KLCC as he lost his tour group (they left him behind apparently) and his friend kept all his belongings. He then proceeded to tell us his name and gave us his handphone number, promising to return the money through bank account when he returned home.
Chew just gave him the money and left. When we thought about it later, it might’ve been a scam. In fact, he never did return the money. But I don’t think Chew regretted wasting that RM50, to possibly help someone in need.
Thus, in response to Bengbeng’s situation as well, I feel that it is really sad that to even HELP someone, we have to actually think of our own safety. Such is the situation now. Depressing. But don’t say yourself a sucker, you had good intentions. *pats back*
given your situation, I’d probably do (and feel) the same but What’s done is done…. :) *cheers*
Voch - Yes man I would have felt safer if you were around. LOL that sounds so damn wrong. Anyway dude, I’m going again tonight (Saturday!). I’m gonna find a new spot to camp.
Eunice - We should be able to analyze and judge the situation, and since there is a risk, how risky it is if we did this or that. In your case, I’d have done it without any qualms too.
Changhh - Hmm, maybe. Ok then :). Guess I did too little that night!
Citygal - Putrajaya is a well guarded area? Really? Hmmm. Some roads in that area are really deserted at night :p. Anyway, that’s not really my concern. I wasn’t actually driving my *own* car, you see. In KL/PJ area, I would need analyze the situation and weigh the risks, before making a decision. Besides, cabs are more easily available there. Unless it’s an emergency!
Sat - I guess it really depends on situations and in that particular case I experienced, I thought about the risks, and also the fact that there were hundreds of other cars around (but I doubt there were cabs). They could have approached the car behind mine, a C-class Benz. Or the one in front of me, which was a Mitsubishi Storm.
Angel - I have stopped thinking about it ler. But when I still was, it didn’t occur to me that I had actually averted a robbery. Erm, the RM50/km was offered in desperation I guess. Our currency maybe very small oni leh. In any case, the moment I published this entry, I had already begun to believe they were telling the truth. But it’s all too late now, isn’t it.
Adam - No Adam, it’s not stupidity. I do not mind giving strangers a ride if the circumstances were better. It wasn’t my own car I was driving, actually and my parents would give me an earful if anything happened. Two cameras, my phone, cash and car - And the fact that I was alone, as well as there were other cars around.
Dylan - Yes man I think you’re right! :).
Trish - Gee, what do you mean ‘lose’ me ;p. If anything, it wouldn’t be my life that they were after! Haha ;)
Keeyit - My way in was smooth, although there were many cars parked by the roadside. So I went quite deep, passed the bridge and went deeper before finding a nice parking. But the way out was terrible, that’s all.
Giddy Tiger - Now that you mentioned, no I didn’t notice any. There were, however, policemen overriding the traffic lights at junctions.
Day-dreamer - Yea :) You hadn’t been coming to my site for a while, been busy eh? Thanks, I’ll be taking more photos maybe tonight and/or next week!
Amy - (Okla, ‘Amy’ instead of how we usually addressed you in school k? :p) Yeap, as much as I hope they would understand, I actually doubt it too. On you and Chew’s Petaling Street encounter, I think it’s okay to fork out 50 bux to help someone in need. If he had intended to lie or anything, RM50 is simply too small a figure to be even satisfied :p. As long as there are people around and in your case, he even gave his phone number (goes to show he expected your insecurity and therefore took into account your interest), I think it’s reasonable.
Alicia - Hello Alicia! *Grins* Not going to watch fireworks yourself?
from a girl perspective, better dun give them a ride!
from a guy perspective, you can do so if you dare to take the risk…
from a malaysian perspective, hm…kinda hard to do so….
lol, its still Hui Ling amongst close friends. It’s up to you…. typed for convenience sometimes :P
Elyn - Ar? Can one la actually. If I had a friend with me I’d say ‘jom let’s go’ dy.
Amy - Haha, I see. I now have two readers named ‘Amy’ :p (At least the ones I know lah)
I say RM 50/km - I would.
Pretty sure no one would wanna steal my car.
And when I invite them in, I’ll hide my wallet.
Lol.
I’m very money minded I suppose.
* I think Rm50/km for them is pretty cheap. U sure RM 50 ah..not 50 cents /km ?
End of the day YOU did the right thing. Have a good week !
Hey guess what! Last last Sunday when I was in M’cca I was approached by this chinese lady in the middle of the night at the clinic to send her somewhere. I have thoughts like u too but she kept begging me and I have a fren wif me. At the end, I couldn’t bring myself to say no. So I brought her to her destination, luckily nothing happen to me.. >_
Wonderboy - Like I said, I’d be glad to help even if there were no $ offered. It’s not the money, but something else. Btw dude, your car is teh awesomeness. I know cuz I’ve seen you racing with it. Naw I’m just kidding. I known which is yours, and it sure is a nice ride.
Cbenc12 - I’m happy you offered to help. I am sure many others, if put in your shoes, would have helped too. After all, she was only a woman and you had a friend with you ;).
Thanks for dropping by, everyone!
I was stuck too on the Wed, Australia team. Today last day, but i am scared to go!
Maybe I am that kind of like-to-take-risk kind of person, I would even offer them for a ride without them asking… :)
Cbenc12 - I went for the last day, and my car couldn’t move even an inch after the show, for more than one-and-half hours. The whole road was completely jammed and noone could get out until at least one-and-half hours after the show had ended. I was damn sleepy at work the next morning :(
EP - Yes, I think you would have done just that! I know you would! That’s why Malaysia is very lucky to have bolehans like you ^^